My private fear

I tell myself that it's good for his hand/eye coordination,
That it really gives him joy,
That it benefits his "visual acuity" (whatever that is),
And that it allows us a chance to "bond."

But the truth is that I'm really, secretly, deeply AFRAID:

ONE DAY (soon), MY SON WILL BEAT ME IN MARIO KART.

It'll go like this: I'm Donkey Kong and I'm on the last uphill before the finish line. Rainbow Road is almost done and I'm out-front. Quick dash to the right around the last of the barking sharks when all of a sudden, out of nowhere, comes a red shell, check that, THE red shell that spells the end of my fatherly domination. As DK finishes his horrific tumble, Bowser swoops by on the left and takes the checkered flag, prompting my little, adorable, curly-haired muppet of a soon-to-be 4 year old son to cry out, "Daddy, I beat you!"

Now if you'll excuse me I'm off to memorize some Mario Kart shortcuts...